EMOTIONALLY FOCUSED THERAPY
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is a highly effective, research-based approach designed to restore, repair and strengthen relationships. EFT is based in the science of attachment theory, and focuses on transforming negative patterns of interaction, increasing emotional awareness, and building healthier and more fulfilling relationships.
​​EFT is recognized as one of the most effective therapeutic approaches for resolving
relationship distress and enhancing partner and family connections.
When we argue with our partner or family members, the arguments often follow a similar pattern. The topic may be different, but the pattern of interaction is the same. EFT helps couples and family members transform negative cycles through identifying the pattern, increasing emotional awareness, and guiding clients to identify and share their needs in a way that increases understanding and compassion.
In EFT, you will learn about your communication patterns as a couple or family and how to regulate overwhelming emotions. You will become more skilled at connecting with others in more honest and constructive ways. This type of therapy helps to mend relationship wounds and create a richer, stronger bonds with those who are most important to you.
EFT with Couples
When working with couples, EFT seeks to enhance feelings of safety between the partners. When trust has been built, couples can then work together to uncover emotions that have been left unexpressed and have resulted in negative patterns and conflict. When those emotions are acknowledged and expressed, couples can work together to meet each other’s needs and effectively communicate feelings. Oftentimes, couples seeking therapy are suffering from deep wounds and negative patterns in their relationship. They may feel unable to open up to their partner, or believe that their partner is unwilling to listen or simply doesn’t care. Couples who attend therapy learn skills to form a more secure attachment in their relationship.
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EFT with Families
In family therapy, EFT seeks to foster trust, mutual respect, understanding, and healthy communication among the family members. When family members feel emotionally secure in their discussions, together they are able to address issues and disclose feelings. With each member feeling heard and validated, the family can work together to find solutions to problems. Families learn the skills necessary to form a secure and validating environment where parents and children can comfortably communicate with one another in order to resolve problems that come up regularly in the family relationship.
Benefits
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EFT has a long proven history of empirical research which demonstrates numerous benefits, enabling couples and families to elevate their emotional awareness, strengthen their relationships, and achieve lasting results.
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Increase Emotional Awareness
Clients explore why they feel certain emotions and how this affects their interpersonal relationships. This provides them with the tools they need to break prior negative habits. EFT helps clients better identify, understand, and regulate their emotions, leading to healthier coping mechanisms and greater emotional resilience. This process helps individuals become more attuned to their emotions, allowing them to better understand their own needs and motivations.
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Strengthen Relationships
EFT considerably bolsters relationships by:
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Identifying negative patterns and substituting them with healthier ones.
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Promoting secure attachment bonds by reducing negative interaction patterns between partners.
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Helping clients learn new ways of responding to issues, fostering improved problem-solving and greater harmony in their relationships.
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Being particularly beneficial for couples dealing with significant relationship challenges, as it helps them develop more meaningful and fulfilling connections.
Effectiveness
EFT has a 77% effectiveness rate indicating strong success in improving relationships.
By creating a healing environment, EFT helps clients develop new positive cycles that become self-reinforcing. This effectiveness highlights the transformative power of EFT, making it a highly effective therapeutic approach for creating lasting change and improving relationship satisfaction.
Phases of Treatment
EFT is divided into three clearly defined phases that provide a clear pathway toward healing.
Phase 1: Assessment & De-escalation
This initial phase focuses on identifying presenting concerns, strengths, negative patterns of interaction, and underlying emotions driving the pattern. This phases teaches clients how to identify their negative patterns that cause distress within their relationships. These patterns are then linked to attachment issues to reveal the root of unhealthy and/or hurtful behaviors. By digging into the cause of potential fears (for example, abandonment), partners and family members learn to recognize how their actions are impairing their relationship. Clients also learn and practice communication skills in order to facilitate productive conversations.
Phase 2: Restructuring
Restructuring gives clients the skills to improve how they communicate and share with each other. Clients learn to discuss emotions while also showing empathy and compassion. The fundamental goal of this phase is to build security within the relationship. Clients are encouraged and supported to be vulnerable with each other and to engage in a healthy manner that can strengthen their connection. Clients learn to identify and express underlying needs and feelings and enhance their emotional intimacy.
Phase 3: Consolidation
Finally, EFT comes to the consolidation stage. In these sessions, clients practice their newly acquired skills and facilitate the emergence of solutions to problematic issues. They explore how they can reduce the chances of negative interactions to prevent further disconnection and increase their capacity for more positive interactions. As consolidation is reached, new patterns replace the old habits, which may have included reactivity and defensiveness. The goal is for this to be a permanent change for both partners.
